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Tuesday, January 25, 2011

I HAVE LOST ME MOOSE

Ya, my little ode to the stereotypical artiste,

So, no offense to the Greeks but toga clad semi naked ladies really aren't my thing. Now moose or should i say mooosei (pronounced with an i) are another thing entirely. Large... Hairy... Prone to spitting; with all the features of a quintessential "chowkidar baba", pretty much a writers paradise.

The only problem is AKU isn't a very moose prone environment. For some reason one sniff of the devils brew/Guyton and your friendly neighborhood moose hightails it to the nearest "liberal arts" college (heavy on the liberal light on the college please). Now, being of a less than sound mind and a clearly bitter moose-less state i have some theories as to why me beloved moose left me:

  • Cant take the heat... spitting and pooping is hard work, lives depend on the digestive systems of these glorious quadrupeds 
  • Dead baby issues or maybe that's just me.. i mean seriously who puts babies in jars, i get the whole pursuit of knowledge crap but there are some lines you do not cross *shivers*
  • XOXO look at the hair on that moose: now this is a serious issue, med students lack lives thus, they bitch about other med students lives (the whole vicious cycle deal). its kind of sad really, but hey, who am i to talk??? I'm the loser mourning the moose. (note to self: import life NOW)
  • The Weather. Ever smelt a moose in July, would turn anyone suicidal 
  • I SUCK.... no that cant be right
  • All the taarna/poondi/ogling/drooling/bulging eyes bugs bunny impressions, scared em off (moosei are very sensitive hunka hunka meats)
  • THE DEATH OF ALL THAT IS  SACRED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ( sorry the zealot in me couldn't help that)
  • Zardari; cuz, well, lets face it hes to blame for everything
  • T.J, aka menopausal man, the physiology professor from hell, scared them off
A new race of super mooses..... Israeli conspiracy.... moose burgers... Aliens... more POOP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


AAARRRRRRGHHHH!!!!!!.... forget it. I lost me moose. The world sucks

Sincerely moose-less